i found a reason to smile

today was one of those bullshxt days where i wish i could give it to one of those folks who constantly say:

“you living the good life.”

to begin: i spent the great part of the sunlight questioning my motives for attending not one – but two – historically black colleges. first bethune-cookman & now howard university.
i am a proud graduate and soon-to-be graduate of historically black colleges because there are things to be learned there other that what can be found in text books and old slave quarters (speaking of UVA).
there are things we learn about ourselves – in our own time – around people who look like us.
we learn to run the hustle – we learn to say “fxck you” to stress and hard times.

the financial aid issues alone will send you into the real world with a “you can’t beat me” type attitude.
and i love it.

but today i questioned my reasonings when i found in an office on the second floor of the a-building – two seconds away from threatening to kill the lady with the accent & whoever thought it was funny.

but i politely took a name – and told her i would return in the morning.

the problem is – and always has been:
when you give a nigga an inch – they think they’re a ruler.

side note: when i say ‘nigga’ i refer to all ignorant people – of all colors.

someone gave this woman a job out of high school and she’s going to abuse this new found power.

message: until you have attended an hbcu – do not judge any mass murderers.
luckily i don’t have it in me to kill.

—–

i decided against my 6:40 class because @mystercarter is in town for a few days & @thebrownbarbie & @sunyblack & him all were kicking it at bus boys & poets on 14th & v.

so i went through.

if you ever catch me telling a story and laughing so hard noodles fall from my nose – they were probably somewhere close by when it happened. i love these people. even though they’ve seemed to replace me & take long distance trips without me.

but i tell them everything.
hell, i skipped class for them.

but tonight was great in spite of pre-meditated [blank].

—–

and while i’m sitting here waiting on my chicken & fries from the oven i surf the net.
i ran across a picture of ‘the kid’ when he was two years old
and i can’t help but smile.

he is the only thing more important than myself.

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