My COVID-19 Story: Probably

A couple of weeks ago, I’m eating a broccoli and cheddar Hot Pocket while in a video conference work meeting (Thanks to Microsoft Teams). Before I microwaved it, I put a little butter and garlic on top to make it pop just a lil bit more. Because why not?

So there I am, snacking and smacking and smiling all up in the camera. But hmmm, maybe the garlic isn’t so great because I CAN’T SMELL OR TASTE it. I also couldn’t taste or smell the broccoli or cheddar or bread. My teammate asks, “how’s everything been with you?”

Me: I’m good. Adjusting fine. Hmm, is it strange I can’t taste or smell my food!?

Her: Oh no. That’s a symptom of COVID-19!

Me: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

So I run to the kitchen, open my garlic, and take a deep whiff. NOTHING. I run to brush my teeth with my strong ass toothpaste. NOTHING. “The Rona got me,” I thought.

Research, research, research. I’m in the epicenter of the virus. Yep, I definitely have it, I’m thinking. I call the doctors and they say don’t even come in for testing unless I’m 4 seconds from DEATH and to isolate myself for 7-14 days.

I wait for more symptoms, but nothing else. 5 days prior, I woke up with a migraine that lasted 3 days (I blame this on adjusting to a new life, not COVID-19).

Y’all who know me know that my appetite is almost equivalent to Steven Assanti from TLC’s My 600lb Life. Not being able to taste or smell my food was killing me! What is life about if you can’t love food? I LIVE to EAT.

Anywho…3 days later, I wake up, rub my ear and smell it. Finally, my senses are back, but only about 50%. Faint smells and tastes. I could smile again.

Doctors (paraphrase): Yeah, I’m sure it was the Rona, and you fought it and it’s gone. Or you may have just been a carrier. We may never know. Glad you’re good.

I’m back to 100% with the senses.

A few things I did while I was down (still doing them):

1. Boiled water and steamed over the stove for the length of Da Baby’s “Intro” 5 times a day.

2. Drank hot honey, lemon, ginger, ginseng tea.

3. Meditated often.

4. Stood in the shower for about 45 minutes.

5. Cleaned my house.

6. Avoided the news.

Did these things work? I don’t know! It surely didn’t hurt. Am I 100% sure I had the Rona? About 95%. How do I feel now? I feel amazing – except this quarantine stuff. I miss human contact. Over here touching myself like Tweet. Oop, there goes my hand…

Well, that’s my story. Wishing y’all good health and positivity (no COVID-19)

Thanks for coming to my Darnell Talk.